I'm 1 week from my due date and am trying to remain as positive as possible. Its tempting to backslide into feeling fear and apprehension about my upcoming birth, especially since my last experience was pretty traumatic for all involved. I had a good cry yesterday and reminded myself how out of control of this experience that I am. I cannot decide when it will happen, how things will go, or how I will handle it. This is where the rubber hits the road with my faith: an amazing opportunity to trust more and rely on God to carry me, no matter what happens. One of the verses that has been in my mind is this: "Peace I leave with you. My peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." I have been recently learning the power of positive thinking and talk. During my pregnancy I have been saying and reading positive statements. I made a small flip chart that I look at almost every night with reminders and scripture to this end. I was just browsing the internet to find more pregnancy affirmations and found the following:
Only I can give birth to this baby and I accept that challenge.
Babies are born when they are ready, not when doctors, midwives, or anyone decides.
I deserve to have the birth I desire.
I embrace the concept of healthy pain.
I truly do believe that I am going to have a great birth. I hope it comes soon. In the meantime, I am going to stay in the positive and REFUSE to hear or accept any negativity from anyone.
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Omie
Omie (we think) is an imaginary friend that Ben has. He talks about him/her frequently and asks to pray for him/her before bed. We have no idea where he came up with the name and are trying to just go with it :)
Sweetness
Steven and I woke up this morning to our son shouting: "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Ben all done sleeping!" What a great way for a non-morning person to wake up....chuckling :)
Monday, June 25, 2007
2 years old
Last week our little Ben turned 2! Unfortunately, on his actual birthday, he was quite sick with a high fever and ended up going to urgent care with an ear infection. He's on the mend now, and loves the way his medicine tastes :)
He is looking and acting older these days, its hard to believe he is growing up. He is extremely verbal and expressive, which is wonderful! Lately, he seems to know that something is changing. He's more attached to both Steven and I, especially Steven, and cries whenever he leaves either one of us. He keeps saying "take the baby out!" It will be interesting to see how he responds to the new one, I think he will be great. I know it will be a big adjustment for him as he is used to getting all of the attention. I am a little over a week from my due date, and getting excited!
Benjamin loves water and playing with it. If we let him, he would play with the hose, a water bottle, or the sink all day long! He's enjoying the pool more and more each time we go.
He has a great sense of humor and loves being silly. He's learning how to jump (another favorite), although rarely gets much air off the ground :)
He loves to figure things out and discover how things work. He's good at pushing buttons and setting up and running our DVD player.
He brings us so much joy. Its hard to imagine what our lives were like without him. Happy Birthday, my beloved son.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Ben's 2nd Birthday Party
This weekend we celebrated Ben's birthday with a party on Saturday morning. We had a great time with many good friends and family present. The kids played in the kiddie pool, we showed off our new basement, and had breakfast foods and CAKE. His actual birthday is tomorrow, but we don't want to confuse him too much and probably won't really celebrate it. I'll post later about my musings on Ben's 2 years of life. Enjoy these photos from the party. There are more photos on our Flickr site (which you cannot access by clicking on these photos).
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Our Basement is DONE!!!!!
After many long hours and late nights, we finished our basement on Tuesday night. Our carpet got installed Wednesday. It looks STUNNING, like a totally different space. Ben loves running around on the carpet. I think it will be a space we really enjoy. The colors are warm and comforting, and its cool on hot days. It iwll be a great relaxation space as well. Steven and I are both pretty exhausted and are excited to be able to now use our space. We have a few little projects to fully complete it, none of which are urgent. It was worth it, I hope, we have doubled our living space and have definitely added to the value of our home. Now we can focus on getting ready for the baby. I am hoping we have a couple of weeks to relax, reconnect, and spend time together as a family. You can see the before photos here and the after photo with our carpet. It looks GREAT! YIPPEE!
The Choo Choo (again)
We visited the Choo-Choo again with our friends Amy and Caden. It is a great diner nearby where the food is delivered by train to the table. Ben loved it even more this time (his third trip). Kids get a free meal during the month surrounding their bday, so that was a bonus, too! Ben liked his bday cupcake with train whistle, but wasn't quite ready to blow out the candle :) We had a great time!
On our drive there, we went through a couple areas heavy with Cicadas. They were EVERYWHERE, running into our car, covering tree trunks, and making quite the racket! It was really great to see. So far, we have missed them completely at our house. Although I think they are fascinating, I am relieved we don't have to deal with their mass quantities.
On our drive there, we went through a couple areas heavy with Cicadas. They were EVERYWHERE, running into our car, covering tree trunks, and making quite the racket! It was really great to see. So far, we have missed them completely at our house. Although I think they are fascinating, I am relieved we don't have to deal with their mass quantities.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
36 weeks and 23 Months
I don't have any great photos to post of either Ben or I right now, so have to use this one.
I am now 36 weeks pregnant and seeing the final stretch in front of me. I feel surprisingly GREAT, which is a big treat because last pregnancy at this point I felt like a bloated sausage. I can't decide if its the impact of a) less of a crazy work schedule b) feeling more relaxed c) gaining less weight or d) taking Omega-3 fatty acids (which have been proven to lower blood pressure and increase mood among many other health benefits). My energy level is good, I even painted our entire basement this weekend, military grade gas mask and all. I have been having some irregular contractions and feeling pressure, all of which I am taking to be a good sign. I'm getting excited for this birth, praying a LOT, reading many verses and affirmations, and staying positive about our upcoming birth. My last experience was really difficult, and I am believing that this experience will be different and healing.
Steven and I are both exhausted with trying to complete our basement project. We had hoped to be done by June 1st, and will be done the middle of next week. These things always take much longer than we expect! Steven is doing a fabulous job, we both think he could be an electrician now, he has done so much rewiring in our basement (and many minor plumbing repairs also). We were remarking the other day how much we have learned through this experience, although we both have different take home messages. For me, it has convinced me that I never want to own a home that needs major work again. For Steven, he's ready to jump into the next big project with both feet (mostly because he has a lot of great tools now!). The basement is going to be beautiful, much worth all the effort.
Benjamin is well over 23 months, and I have again neglected to write about him. He is so much fun right now, becoming so independent, and is very verbal. It is delightful to communicate with him as he understands so much. He loves to do many things by himself and enjoys the accomplishment when he does: "Ben DO IT!" His gifts are definitely in pushing buttons and in discovering how things work. He loves water and anything to do with water :) Ice Cream (aka "special treat") is becoming his weakness. He's shy in groups, very playful and verbal with his friends. He's becoming more particular about sharing, and usually does well when given choices or options. He seems to know he's going to be a big brother, they other day grabbed my abdomen and said "take the baby out!" He's very tender and snuggly, and also playful. The other day I had two pigtails and he giggled and pointed saying "SILLY!" He loves to play peekaboo, especially when we pretend we can't see him. His giggles light our world. I can't believe in a few short weeks, he will be 2 years old. Time sure does fly when you're having this much fun.
I am feeling very sentimental about not having time alone with him anymore in a few weeks. Its hard to imagine that I will love the next child with as much depth as I do Benjamin. I know I will, its just hard to imagine. I'm treasuring each precious moment!
I am now 36 weeks pregnant and seeing the final stretch in front of me. I feel surprisingly GREAT, which is a big treat because last pregnancy at this point I felt like a bloated sausage. I can't decide if its the impact of a) less of a crazy work schedule b) feeling more relaxed c) gaining less weight or d) taking Omega-3 fatty acids (which have been proven to lower blood pressure and increase mood among many other health benefits). My energy level is good, I even painted our entire basement this weekend, military grade gas mask and all. I have been having some irregular contractions and feeling pressure, all of which I am taking to be a good sign. I'm getting excited for this birth, praying a LOT, reading many verses and affirmations, and staying positive about our upcoming birth. My last experience was really difficult, and I am believing that this experience will be different and healing.
Steven and I are both exhausted with trying to complete our basement project. We had hoped to be done by June 1st, and will be done the middle of next week. These things always take much longer than we expect! Steven is doing a fabulous job, we both think he could be an electrician now, he has done so much rewiring in our basement (and many minor plumbing repairs also). We were remarking the other day how much we have learned through this experience, although we both have different take home messages. For me, it has convinced me that I never want to own a home that needs major work again. For Steven, he's ready to jump into the next big project with both feet (mostly because he has a lot of great tools now!). The basement is going to be beautiful, much worth all the effort.
Benjamin is well over 23 months, and I have again neglected to write about him. He is so much fun right now, becoming so independent, and is very verbal. It is delightful to communicate with him as he understands so much. He loves to do many things by himself and enjoys the accomplishment when he does: "Ben DO IT!" His gifts are definitely in pushing buttons and in discovering how things work. He loves water and anything to do with water :) Ice Cream (aka "special treat") is becoming his weakness. He's shy in groups, very playful and verbal with his friends. He's becoming more particular about sharing, and usually does well when given choices or options. He seems to know he's going to be a big brother, they other day grabbed my abdomen and said "take the baby out!" He's very tender and snuggly, and also playful. The other day I had two pigtails and he giggled and pointed saying "SILLY!" He loves to play peekaboo, especially when we pretend we can't see him. His giggles light our world. I can't believe in a few short weeks, he will be 2 years old. Time sure does fly when you're having this much fun.
I am feeling very sentimental about not having time alone with him anymore in a few weeks. Its hard to imagine that I will love the next child with as much depth as I do Benjamin. I know I will, its just hard to imagine. I'm treasuring each precious moment!
Friday, June 01, 2007
First Cicada sighting!
Today we visited Morton Arboreteum with our music group which normally meets on Friday mornings during the year. In the summer, we do activities instead of music. The Arboreteum is gorgeous and has a wonderful children's garden. The Cicada infestation which has been predicted has yet to reach our area, the Arboreteum has LOTS! We got to see our first one up close and personal today. They are really a fascinating insect (which I might not say when they arrive in plague-like numbers), and I think their story is very interesting. More to come later when they come to our town....
Midwives UNITE
I had the privelege of attending the ACNM (American College of Nurse Midwives) conference this past week which was in Chicago. I have wanted to go for years, but its always been at either a bad time, or too cost/time prohibitive to consider going. It was a great conference with wonderful speakers, very inspiring!!!! It made me so proud to be part of such an amazing, talented, and intelligent group of women who are committed to listening to and supporting women.
Another great benefit of the conference was that I got to reconnect with former colleagues and friends (Pam, Kathleen, and Jennifer) who were in town for the conference. We had a wonderful time together. I love these girls!!!!
Another great benefit of the conference was that I got to reconnect with former colleagues and friends (Pam, Kathleen, and Jennifer) who were in town for the conference. We had a wonderful time together. I love these girls!!!!
Ben's new bed
Here is Ben's new toddler bed which we found for a steal at Walmart. IKEA did not come through for us....almost $200 for the cheapest option!?!? Ben is doing great in his bed and so far hasn't wandered around the house in the middle of the night. He seems proud to be in a "big boy bed" and announces it to many who visit. We have the room re-arranged in preparation for the baby and it looks great. We will probably put the two kids together after a few months with the baby in our room. Our little boy is growing up....
Haircut breakthrough
We broke down and spent the extra $6 to get a super-deluxe (i.e. super-fun) haircut for Ben. Its at a store called "Kid Snips" which is a chain of mall stores which does haircuts for kids. Boy, are they smart (don't you wish you could have invented such a thing?). They have car chairs, videos of just about anything you can imagine, balloons, suckers, and toys to choose at the end, and GREAT hair stylists to boot. For the first time in his life of about 15 haircuts, Ben didn't cry. Watching Thomas and driving in his car chair definitely helped. It was such a pleasant experience that we might just have to go back.
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